Is it being anal or ocd to ask your roommates to put their dirty dishes in the sink when they are done?

p>I recently moved in with my best friend and her boyfriend. They are angels compared to previous roommates. As am I to them. All I asked was that dishes be put in the sink or dishwasher when they leave the area they were in or leave the house. Also that food be rinsed off if they were to be left in the sink. I don't leave my things lying around the kitchen or living room for them to contend with because it would be rude and I expect the same courtesy. We are three adults, all about 22. I don't care how their room or bathroom looks because that is their space. The living room is communal though. I don't want to sit down to watch tv with a bowl of old spaghettios staring me in the face. If it was a once in a while thing it wouldn't bother me. I would just shrug it off and pick it up. However it is apparent that it is a habit. She wakes up early to have time to herself and get ready for work at her leisure so I know she has time to do something that takes maybe five seconds. I have sat down with my friend and politely asked that she take care to consider that other people use the living room and things like that bother me. I don't even care if they don't wash the dishes in the sink. I also came home to find the lint roller on the kitchen counter. I just don't like the idea of cat hair and lint sitting where I prepare food. They have a desk, a bar, two end tables, and a coffee table to put things like that on. The only actual things in the living room that are mine are the coffee table and my dvds. They don't even used coasters like I asked. I got really frustrated when I came home to the mess. There was a bag of trash by the door on the carpet that someone sat there two days ago, a bowl of spaggetios on the table with food left in it, the tv was on, the cat food scoop was left on the counter by the stove right next to the can opener and the lint roller was on the counter as well. So I sent messages with a pic of the things lying around saying I don't mind picking things up and I understand that you are trying to do better but you need to know these things bug me and I do my best to look out for you guys so I expect the same. I just know what a slippery slope it can be to let things like this go if they bother you. So I did my best to be forward and yes the message may have come across a little passive aggressive but I didn't mean it that way and I told her. I knew if I waited until she got home I would be in bed and the issue wouldn't have been addressed. She called me passive aggressive and said my ocd was driving her bat sh**. She said the things I pointed out weren't a big deal and she didn't want to have to constantly wonder if she was being considerate to me. I felt that last statement was pretty harsh and selfish. I had to get rid of my cat because he was tearing their things up. Once he was gone she kept telling her cat playfully that is was so nice now that he wasn't there to bother her. I have been really depressed and upset about having to get rid of my cat. Enough with the rant. I'm getting off subject. Should I have just let those things go even though they made me uncomfortable? I do a lot of things her way and try to stay out of the way but I feel like I need to set some boundaries of my own.
We are renting an apartment. Everything is split three ways.
Like I said, I don't mind doing the dishes. In fact I do them most of the time anyway by hand. When they leave dishes in the dishwasher for days I put those up too. If I don't put them up they keep leaving them in the sink, rise them out, and put food in the garbage disposal or trash can. I've already asked them several times to at least put their dishes in the sink. I didn't throw a fit. I just reminded her again and pointed out that it's continuing to not happen. :(
Correction: If I don't put them up they keep leaving them in the sink.*
All I ask is that they put them in the sink, rise them out, and put food in the garbage disposal or trash can.**
I'm not upset that they leave them in the sink. I'm upset that my roommate continuously leaves her dirty bowls and plates in the living room and her boyfriend or i have to pick it up. It grosses me out and I've asked her politely several times already not to do it. All I did was bring it to her attention and she blew up on me and said I was ocd and driving her batshit. I just don't want to be her maid and I would like her to remember that there are other people that use the living room that don't want to deal with her dirty dishes. I just don't understand how hard it is to put your dish in the sink and rinse it out when you are done. Besides all that she also said that I was being ridiculous and those things shouldn't matter when she snapped at me for putting lunch meat and sandwich cheese in the same drawer because that's not the way her mother does it. I'm tired of being run over by her. I have feelings and preferences too.


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