What do I do about my marriage?

I have been married for four years. We are both 25. I got married when she asked me to get married when I was in the military (been out since 2009). I lived with and had a relationship with her for two years before I joined the military. We were best friends. When I think about her now, I am indifferent. I supported her with my military wages for the entire time that we have been married and she just started her career this past Monday.

The main issue now is a lack of respect. She continues to speak with her ex boyfriend "first love" that she was with for three years (before I met her). I have asked her on multiple occasions to not talk to him. She went out with him on two separate dates, nights, occasions, whatever with him while I was deployed to Iraq. Once to dinner and another to have drinks. I let it slide because I thought I loved her. She compares this to her asking me to not stack the dirty dishes in the sink, but I continue to do it. Yet I am the one 85% of the time that does the dishes. After that I was angry and reiterated my feelings on the subject and thought that she had finally decided to give it up. She told me tonight that she did it because she was lonely but claims she has never cheated.

I thought that she had been out of communication with him but somehow he knew that we now live in NY and he happens to be in town to see a Mets game. He wants to take her out to dinner again. What is she doing to lead him on and make him think that this is okay?

A few months ago an Army buddy of mine and his wife came to visit us. One night we went out drinking and his wife asked mine, "Why did you get married?" And without missing a beat, she says, "For the money." I swallowed that hard but never brought it up. I still haven’t.

I have until the 13th of June to submit my apartments lease renewal. With or without my name on it.

We had plans to drink a few beers tonight and spend some time together. But then she dropped the text convo with the ex on me. I didn’t drink any because I didn’t want to be upset and drunk. Never a good mix with anyone. She said, "Well, if you’re not going to drink with me, then I am going to a bar." She then proceeded to get ready to go out. She got dressed and straightened her hair and stopped and asked if I wanted this. I told her to do what makes her happy. But as she continues to drink the convo continues to go in loops because she repeats herself. So I secluded myself to reflect and figure out what to do. So here I am. Open minded.

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