Will you read and c/c my poem (Marianne Islands) if you may?

[Marianne islands]

Thesis attained, a transient absurd message,
our cargo vessel on his supercilious drainage
of our souls, decided to betray our, of thirty, crew,
so started sinking, stubbornly, in a black-blue hue.

It was his will, I think; I am a nautilus enlisted man,
we routed on Pacific, from Magellan’s straights
following a hyperbolic route, reaching Marianne
islands, South of Japan, where deepest depths are,

of close 12000 meters, the sonar links, vertical.
In how long a damaged steadfast that shudders,
reaches the bottom of an outsmarted end logical,
of our new invited souls, due to an inert rudder?

Our cause is somewhere lost, a propagation
of a despaired instant, grievance’s emission,
so, our prayers are directed towards a cold
of no remorse depth of darkened souls, mold.

Maybe if I travel above the cumuli, I ‘ll manage
to be a groom in an adorned, dreaming feast
or beguiled by a buffoon spirit’s caused trauma,
as all misty horizons of our purposes’ chasma.

I sent my prayer way up this fog’s continuity
to maybe encounter a dim guardian star light
and there (maybe) will find your message trite,
an antidote to my nautilus cold grave ambiguity.

[To all good souls that abide in light and not in darkness.

To all Hellenes (Greek) nautilus, who lost their lives, serving
a manly cause: Working honestly to help their families, in
the largest commercial fleet of the world: The Hellenic. (Greek).]
Nancy: Rhyme in this poem is elementary. What impressed you was the good marriage between words.

Kirby: Poetry is about sentiments, and this poem is about a ship which is sinking. The sentiments are genuine of a MAN who is going to die. By the way, I am among the fewest who express of "sentiments" in their posts.

The poem is a very good, model work, and you should be rather content by the poet, his friendship, his level of thinking and his proper, of a gentleman way to invite you to his posts, and world, generally speaking.

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